a secret behind many mysteries a revelation explained

Discussion in 'The Lounge' started by JohnHurley, Jan 11, 2019.

  1. JohnHurley

    JohnHurley Blues Newbie

    Joined:
    Oct 11, 2018
    Messages:
    79
    Likes Received:
    111
    So apparently part of the secret order of the world involves dish towels. We have a lot of dish towels in our house I think many of them go back 25 / 30 years maybe more.

    My wife has ( pick one ) ( reported to me / asked me very nicely / sometimes yelled at me ) that I use dish towels incorrectly from time to time. I get new ones out that I do not need to get out. I use too many of them. I do not see how many of them are out there already. I should not put them into the laundry basket there is a time and place known only to ( not me ) when they will be selected and washed and put back into the rotation.

    There are even more arcane secrets involving what to use a paper napkin for to clean up with / when you should use a paper towel instead ( and when you should not use a paper towel ) / and when the dish towel is the correct choice but that's yet another convoluted thing I do wrong.

    Last night wife has dream a bad dream a nightmare even. OMG John has used every single dish towel incorrectly and they are all waiting to be cleaned in the laundry basket. Every single freaking one has been mis used. There is NOT A SINGLE ONE that is ready to be used correctly and IT IS ALL my fault. The world order has been disrupted by not following the ( very unclear ) principles of using dish towels correctly.

    Wow do we live dangerously here or what?

    Thanks John

    PS I feel a little better now but I have to also report the dog is a suspect of sneaking onto the couch and sleeping there possibly at night from time to time when every one is upstairs.
     
    Jack, Crossroads, snarf and 5 others like this.
  2. CaptainMoto

    CaptainMoto Blues Voyager

    Joined:
    Dec 17, 2012
    Messages:
    5,954
    Likes Received:
    3,697
    Wow!
    Time to declare a national emergency! :cautious:

    Now, at risk of introducing complete heresy, you could turn her nightmares into pleasant dreams with one simple act.
    -----Learn how to do the laundry-----:eek:


    WORD OF CAUTION:
    Doing laundry could introduce friction if you use the wrong detergent, water temperature, dryer setting or fabric softener. This also could bring criticism if the proper folding technique is not deployed and, NEVER NEVER mix colors and whites!
     
    #2 CaptainMoto, Jan 11, 2019
    Last edited: Jan 11, 2019
  3. Al Holloway

    Al Holloway Bristol UK

    Joined:
    Nov 30, 2008
    Messages:
    1,296
    Likes Received:
    1,098
    Buy a dishwasher fixes most domestic issues I find:whistle:

    cheers

    Al.
     
  4. jackderby52

    jackderby52 Prehistoric blues knob (not newbie)

    Joined:
    Oct 6, 2009
    Messages:
    983
    Likes Received:
    1,076
    If that was the case, I'd have hundreds of them by now... :)...
     
    Jack and JohnHurley like this.
  5. Silicon Valley Tom

    Silicon Valley Tom It makes me happpy to play The Blues!

    Joined:
    Jul 13, 2012
    Messages:
    1,593
    Likes Received:
    1,757
    When it comes to the mind of a woman, a man can do nothing correctly! :LOL: That is what makes a perfect marriage! :) Once that important fact is understood, you are on your way to a successful relationship. ;) I hope! :whistle::)

    Remember, each day is a "new world"! :(

    Tom
     
    PapaBear, sloslunas and Crossroads like this.
  6. JohnHurley

    JohnHurley Blues Newbie

    Joined:
    Oct 11, 2018
    Messages:
    79
    Likes Received:
    111
    I think Tom is the only one on track here ha ha thank Tom!

    Yes we have a dishwasher the "dish towels" remain a part of most american kitchens. They are used and accumulated and remembered and stored in many many drawers in the kitchen. Don't even ask why there are so many old ones.

    Doing laundry yes I do some of the laundry mostly grabbing my stuff and piling it through. I don[t mind doing it at all but folding things the way she wants them to be folded yikes that's no easy. So mostly just my stuff but ... digressing.

    Yes each day the woman may change her mind completely and we are never ever supposed to object or even remember that it was a different story a previous day right?

    But the main point of my story was kind of intended to be "my wife likes to worry about things" / she gets worried if there is nothing to worry about / leading to ... it's pretty dang funny having a dream where the only thing she could find to worry about was me using up all the dish towels incorrectly ( all of them yikes we have probably 40? ) leading to a crisis.

    It's a crisis! Well that was the dream ...
     
    PapaBear likes this.
  7. Silicon Valley Tom

    Silicon Valley Tom It makes me happpy to play The Blues!

    Joined:
    Jul 13, 2012
    Messages:
    1,593
    Likes Received:
    1,757
    53 years of marriage have taught me many things. My wife likes to worry about worrying. I try to calm her down. Our son and daughter are grown, but she worries about them and everything they do. I learned to go with the flow, and not argue about maters of no importance. My wife is always late. I am always early. There is a great conflict! Expect to be late and then I will not be upset. It is better to think about other things.

    For the first 25 years we were married, I did all the cooking. Then I told Katy, "It's your turn"! ;) Well, I still help, but I no longer do 100% of the cooking. :)

    I will say that I think that I have the best wife in the world! (y):)

    Tom
     
    PapaBear likes this.
  8. snarf

    snarf audiences like their blues singers to be miserable

    Joined:
    Jan 23, 2010
    Messages:
    694
    Likes Received:
    657
    Are you sure that was a dream or was it just one of the times that you wandered through the kitchen. :whistle:

    I totally get this. At the Hacienda del Snarf, we are allowed to have 3 dish towels out at a time according to swmbo. 2 are for decor and hang in various spots around, and 1 is to actually be used. Do NOT hang the one being used on the stove handle next to the decorative one. Do NOT hang the one you're using next to the one hanging on the cooler. (Honestly, I still have no idea where I'm supposed to put it so that it keeps me out of trouble.) And absolutely do NOT frickin' use either of the decorative ones under penalty of being beat about the head and shoulders. Also, if you pull out a 4th one because you don't see the one that is currently supposed to be used to dry dishes, prepare to receive a verbal lashing that will include you being blamed for causing ALL of them to now have to be washed. Apparently that upsets some sort of balance in the space time continuum known as the kitchen.

    And I'll give you a hint on the paper towel/napkin thing. I like paper towels better than napkins, so I just quit buying napkins.. That way there's only one option from which to choose.

    I agree with Tom on the part about learning to go with the flow and not arguing over the little stuff. I disagree with him, however, in that my im-not-so-ho, my swmbo is the best out of all of them. :Beer:
     
    PapaBear likes this.
  9. blackcoffeeblues

    blackcoffeeblues Student Of The Blues

    Joined:
    Mar 4, 2014
    Messages:
    1,049
    Likes Received:
    765
    I agree with all the above----in the first 5 years I was taught how to fold towels---now 41 years later I don't know nothing-- even though I did it according to my lessons 41 years ago. (Got to be that damn computer infecting my honeys brain). I have found the best way to handle it is easy.
    "I'M SORRY HONEY" even when "I AIN'T"--"OK YOUR RIGHT". even when she is so far out in the left field bleachers she can't see thru the clouds.----but it is all good---it beats--HOT TONGUE and COLD SHOULDER" for breakfast, dinner & supper. And don't ever say anything about her hair, whoa, no, no, no- that's when the wall goes up....instantly.
     
  10. JohnHurley

    JohnHurley Blues Newbie

    Joined:
    Oct 11, 2018
    Messages:
    79
    Likes Received:
    111
    We are all saints eh??
     
  11. blackcoffeeblues

    blackcoffeeblues Student Of The Blues

    Joined:
    Mar 4, 2014
    Messages:
    1,049
    Likes Received:
    765
    You said it not me---:eek::eek::eek:
     
  12. jmin

    jmin San Francisco, CA

    Joined:
    Dec 17, 2013
    Messages:
    1,809
    Likes Received:
    1,324
    ...maybe it’s just time to “throw in the towel!” :LOL:
     
  13. Crossroads

    Crossroads Thump the Bottom

    Joined:
    Jun 19, 2010
    Messages:
    1,032
    Likes Received:
    1,262
    John, I feel your pain. I must confess. Apparently I do not close cabinets correctly (didn't even know there was a correct way to close them) , nor can I wash a dish correctly.

    Even if I wash the same dish for 25 minutes and inspect it with an electron microscope, apparently I miss some unseen schmega and the dish has to be rewashed by the Dishmeister General.

    When we eat dinner at the table, the crumbs are always mine, regardless of who they happen to be in front of.

    And me, I love every minute of it, wouldn't trade it for the world :giggle:
     
    #13 Crossroads, Jan 11, 2019
    Last edited: Jan 11, 2019
    sloslunas and paparaptor like this.
  14. paparaptor

    paparaptor The Central Scrutinizer
    Staff Member

    Joined:
    Aug 11, 2010
    Messages:
    5,487
    Likes Received:
    7,223
    Imagine 10 years of mucking horse stalls and being told you're doing it wrong!
     
  15. Silicon Valley Tom

    Silicon Valley Tom It makes me happpy to play The Blues!

    Joined:
    Jul 13, 2012
    Messages:
    1,593
    Likes Received:
    1,757
    Man, my uncle taught me how to use a pitchfork for such occasions! :)

    Tom
     
    jmin and paparaptor like this.
  16. Silicon Valley Tom

    Silicon Valley Tom It makes me happpy to play The Blues!

    Joined:
    Jul 13, 2012
    Messages:
    1,593
    Likes Received:
    1,757
    Perhaps it has to do with a females hormones? Could it be that after a woman has children and they grow up, she has to micromanage her husband? In addition, she has to worry about every little old thing, just to be female? If those words do not get me into trouble with the ladies of the world, well, I do not know what will! ;)

    With age, I have found that it is more relaxing to just not worry about little things. In fact, there are not many things that bother me anymore. I just like to keep my wife happy, and that works so well for me! :):Beer:

    Tom
     
    PapaBear and Ted_Zeppelin like this.
  17. MarkRobbins

    MarkRobbins Blues Newbie

    Joined:
    Jul 22, 2018
    Messages:
    62
    Likes Received:
    125
    If a man talks in the woods, and his wife is not there to hear him, is he still wrong?
     
  18. Boysie

    Boysie Just for fun

    Joined:
    Mar 17, 2011
    Messages:
    50
    Likes Received:
    722
  19. jackderby52

    jackderby52 Prehistoric blues knob (not newbie)

    Joined:
    Oct 6, 2009
    Messages:
    983
    Likes Received:
    1,076
    shocker...
     
    paparaptor likes this.
  20. blackcoffeeblues

    blackcoffeeblues Student Of The Blues

    Joined:
    Mar 4, 2014
    Messages:
    1,049
    Likes Received:
    765
    You must like the job----your still doing it----cleaning up after all of us. :Beer::Beer:;)
     
    PapaBear and paparaptor like this.